No Sell

Mid-writing, today news came to me that Alan Rickman died, which has bummed me out especially in the wake of David Bowie. It doesn’t help that they both died at 69 of cancer. I am sad now.

I’m also triggered by reading up on herbivore men and MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) for the piece I was writing on. Triggering happens.

I’m going to process this now, and then save my other piece for tomorrow. It’s a rant.

I see validity in some the outrage and grievances of both of these subcultures. Society has not only applied traditionalist pressures on my generation, but they continue to do so to our kids to this day. We still have communities and schools that pretend that puberty doesn’t happen and that pubescent adolescents should be capable of carrying on with their lives without warning or explanation or preparation. We still have public schools telling our adolescents that female rape-victims are worthless for having lost their virginity. We still have public schools insisting that children are God’s punishment for having unauthorized sex. We still have public schools pressuring that sex is only for state-approved licensed relationships for the purposes of procreation, and yet you should not expect any support from anyone when trying to feed your larvae. (When we talk about rape culture in the US, I expect this sort of educational instruction is a contributing factor)

Fuck that society. I agree with with the MGTOW sentiment that if this is the model of relationships you are expected to abide, don’t engage. Don’t have kids. Don’t force anyone else to play by these rules. This a really shitty way to raise our kids and I wouldn’t want to participate in such a society either (and to a significant extent I have the option to not).

Japan remains even more traditionalist than the US, and it’s not only expected that Japanese men become salarymen but if they can’t cut it that they should kill themselves rather than dishonor their families with failure. Wow, what a jackass society. And no, I don’t think I can find it in me to be open to a civilization that encourages their young people to kill themselves. Japanophobic? Maybe. If a Japanophobe is someone that disapproves of a society that pressures underperforming children and young adults to kill themselves, then absolutely, yes.

I feel sorry for everyone who lives under such a wretched societal moral code. I suspect that herbivore counterculture, and Japan’s depopulation problem are consequences of sustaining a traditionalist crappy society that pressures their kids to kill themselves. I hope so, as it might actually prevent other societies that might also want to pressure underachievers to suicide to not. Wait. Let’s not do this, lest we end up the way Japan did, extinct and forgotten but for a legacy of ninjas and lolicon…But that society made Mario! Dangit!

Here in the US, I’ve become confused and reserved by both the feminist movement and the various masculinist countermovements. Women get a lot of suck in our society, and that should stop. And men get a bunch of suck in our society too, and I resent that too. (And it should also stop.) Yet I’ve seen incidents on both sides of people being jerks, and I’d rather you all cut that crap out. My position is to abolish societal gender roles entirely. I’d rather that your bits don’t affect anything except who gets to fuck you (e.g. people who want to play with your bits who you want to play with your bits).

Looking at the MGTOW website, though, some of it smacks way too much of Nationalsozialismus rhetoric. It reminds me too much of overpopulated rats who start killing each other when the food supply becomes dear. There’s a shortage of means, yes, but not of love. Not of women. Remember that your desperation is going to drive you to hurt those next to you for money or food or sex. But that’s not who’s responsible for our predicament of scarcity.

Women aren’t the problem, guys. Nor are men. We have a culture that turns sex — what is an expression of love and intimacy — into a commercial exchange, or a crime. Our culture wants us to wear masks. To keep up appearances. To pretend we are something we’re not: perfect workers, Mr. Right, A Flawless Virgin, the ideal nuclear family. You can’t be these things, but there are some people who will accept you as you are. We have a big population. A lot of fish in the sea. Women are tired of wearing war-paint too. If you’re open to being close to and even having feelings for someone who is flawed and scarred, they’re likely to be just as willing to accept you at your worst too.

Men and women alike are in this blitz together. We’re all desperate for more money. We have state officials lying to us and police shooting at us and ISIL actually gunning for us. We have enough to worry about without trying to manipulate each other for food or money or sex or whatever. So consider an alternative to fear and distrust: If you choose to be forthright and speak your truth even when others lie, if you choose to play fair even when others insist on cheating and deceiving, if you forgive and forget and accept that sometimes someone’s going to play you and it’s going to hurt, you not only make the world a better place, you not only develop a reputation for doing right even when others cover their own asses (which is hot to women and men), but you also prove that you are the bravest motherfucker in the universe. It might be worth it.

Anyway. That was a rant.

And then, Alan Rickman is dead. Fuck.


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